Trump dreams of Zohran Mamdani, Slams Pete Hegseth

Donald Trump didn’t give much support to Secretary of War Pete Hegseth in the cold opening of the Dec. 6 episode of “Saturday Night Live.”

Colin Jost reprized his role as Hegseth and berated the press as they asked about United States attacks on boats allegedly piloted by narco-terrorists. After calling one journalist fat and berating another for being single, he credibly denied that the military operation was going according to plan.

“These types of cruel, heartless acts have no place in the ‘Kill Everybody’ operation,” Jost-as-Hegseth said. “Second, I wasn’t even in the room when it happened. Okay, I was so excited after the first attack that I had to make an emergency call to my sponsor… I’m sorry, a guy I met at an anonymous meeting. So I’m not drinking something that I want, but I can’t have it. But I want it, and I need it, and I want it right now. It’s booze.”

Hegseth then brought up James Austin Johnson’s Donald Trump as support, but the president was too busy sleeping and dreaming about New York’s newly elected mayor, Zohran Mamdani, muttering that the politician could “freeze my rent at any time.”

Trump then woke up enough to say, “I’m with Pete, and nothing can change my mind. Unless of course he could hurt me in any way, in which case I’ll throw him under one of Mamdani’s free buses.”

Melissa McCarthy will host the December 6 episode, with Dijon as musical guest.

Watch the cold open below.