8 Effective Mindset Hacks From a Top Real Estate Coach
Successful people possess a belief system that empowers them to achieve their goals, regardless of their circumstances or situations. This doesn’t mean they don’t face failures and setbacks; rather, they refuse to let these obstacles prevent them from reaching their potential.
By most standards, I’ve had a highly successful career in real estate — as a Keller Williams Mega Agent, Broker-Owner, and bestselling author. For the past 14 years, I’ve had the privilege of coaching some of the nation’s top-producing real estate agents. What I can genuinely attest to is that “success leaves clues,” and the following seven mindset hacks are essential components of any successful agent’s belief system.
1. The journey to learn is shorter than a lifetime of regret
If you’re reading this post, you’re likely a person who values learning. While this mindset hack may seem basic, truly grasping its meaning requires a deeper exploration.
Many of my coaching clients are eager for knowledge but often seek it in areas of personal interest rather than in areas where they most need to learn and improve. This tendency leads us to read, listen, and absorb information that aligns with our current beliefs and understandings.
As adults, we may hesitate to invest time to learn new things that seem uninteresting, complicated or outside of our comfort zone. However, as you build and grow your real estate business, you will encounter challenges that demand fresh approaches.
Remember Einstein’s quote: “You cannot solve a problem with the same thinking that created it,” or Henry Ford’s adage, “Do what you have always done… and get what you have always gotten.”
“You cannot solve a problem with the same thinking that created it.”
—Albert Einstein
This mindset hack reminds us that despite the time and effort it takes to learn something new, complicated, or dull, it is far better than living with the regret of not reaching your full potential.
Let’s keep this in mind as you read the remaining hacks. 😉
2. ‘Success must ensue’
Like many others, I yearn for recognition, validation, and money. Yet, success in these things never shows up exactly when I want it to or precisely the way I expected it. This phenomenon is explained in the book Man’s Search for Meaning, authored by Holocaust survivor Viktor E. Frankl.
In the book, Frankl states, “Don’t aim at success. The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one’s personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself…[ ]. You have to let it happen by not caring about it. [ ]…Then you will live to see that in the long-run — in the long-run, I say! — success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it.”
“Don’t aim at success. The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it.”
—Viktor Frankl
When Frankl published the book, he deliberately left his name off the cover, not wishing to be associated with it. Despite a long and successful career as a psychologist, author, and educator, it was this work for which he would ultimately be most revered.
This mindset hack encourages us to focus on helping others, trusting that recognition, validation, and financial rewards will follow in the long run — though perhaps not in the way we expect. Your outcome may turn out to be even better!
3. What you focus on expands
This mindset hack featured in the book Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, written by T. Harv Eker, is rooted in the idea that our thoughts shape our reality. Understanding that whatever we constantly think about, whether positive or negative, tends to grow and become more prominent in our lives.
When we focus on positive aspects — such as gratitude, goals, or personal growth — our attention amplifies these areas, helping us notice more opportunities, solutions, and reasons to be content.
When we focus on positive aspects — such as gratitude, goals, or personal growth — our attention amplifies these areas, helping us notice more opportunities, solutions, and reasons to be content.
Conversely, if we dwell on problems, fears, or obstacles, they also expand as our minds become more attuned to setbacks and difficulties, often making them seem larger than they are.
This is because the mind is wired to filter out information that doesn’t align with our focus. For example, suppose you are focused on the higher interest rates and reasons why buyers can’t buy today. In that case, you’ll miss the signals of opportunity like greater inventory, builder incentives, and assumable mortgages that will allow some buyers to take advantage of the current real estate market.
Ultimately, the mindset hack “What you focus on expands” serves as a reminder that your mindset and where you direct your attention profoundly affect your outcomes.
4, ‘Our relationships, dignity, and peace of mind are more important than a commission check.’
With the real estate market slowing, commission checks are few and far between. Desperation can make it easier to prioritize a payday over your clients’ needs or even do right by others. Author and founder of Keller Williams Realty, Gary Keller’s quote underscores the importance of doing the right thing, regardless of the money.
“Our relationships, dignity, and peace of mind are more important than a commission check.”
—Gary Keller
In a recent coaching session with one of my agent clients, they expressed their frustration that after a recent closing, the buyer called them and told them that the sewer line had backed up. The buyer, who was their client, hired a sewer company and found that the sewer line had significant damage and needed to be repaired — at a cost of $1,200!
The home’s seller was a single elderly lady who had no issues with the plumbing, and the young couple that bought the house had three children. The increased flow of water through the sewer line obviously uncovered a problem that the previous owner hadn’t noticed.
The agent had recommended a sewer scope at the time of inspection, however, due to the expense, the buyer opted not to hire a plumber to inspect the sewer line… big mistake! Now, the buyer wanted the agent to pay for the repairs.
As you can imagine, this agent was very upset and shared with me how unfair this request was. I, on the other hand, looked at it from another perspective. I looked at it through Gary Keller’s lens: “Our relationships, dignity, and peace of mind are more important than a commission check.”
I considered the bigger picture, saying, “Yes, it was the buyer’s responsibility to inspect the line. Yes, you told them to do the inspection. However, when the buyers reflect back on the purchase of their home, what will they remember? How helpful you were in finding them a home, or that the home they bought had a damaged sewer line?”
With this shift in perspective, the agent (though not obligated to)chose to protect the relationship with their client by covering the $1,200 cost to repair the sewer line. This mindset hack helped them to see the bigger picture and long-term ramifications.
5. ‘How am I creating this?’ or ‘How am I allowing it?’
This powerful mindset hack invites us to reflect on how our thoughts, choices, and behaviors contribute to the situations we find ourselves in. This personal responsibility approach encourages a deeper level of self-awareness, asking us to consider whether we consciously or unconsciously allow certain dynamics or patterns to persist in our lives.
For example, a common complaint of many real estate agents is that they are working too much and their clients are calling them at all hours of the day—seven days a week. When posed this problem, I ask them this simple (and sometimes unnerving) question, “How are you creating this problem?”
By asking, “How am I creating this situation or problem?” or “How am I allowing it to be like this?”, we shift our focus from things “happening to us” to a mindset of personal empowerment.
Once they move beyond the initial reluctance to take responsibility for the situation, they often acknowledge that they failed to set clear expectations with the client about when they can be contacted. Incorporating this simple step into their client presentation will resolve 90% of their calls.
By asking, “How am I creating this situation or problem?” or “How am I allowing it to be like this?”, we shift our focus from things “happening to us” to a mindset of personal empowerment — “What can we do to change this?” The result is that we no longer see ourselves as victims of our circumstances. With this mindset hack, we acknowledge our role in shaping our reality, moving from victim to victor!
6. ‘Shine your light!’
Many agents fear ‘putting themselves out there’ because they worry about being rejected. This is especially true when it comes to social media. The mindset hack “Shine Your Light!” is one I’ve excerpted from a post by Amy Pearson. It reads something like this:
One-third of people are haters. They will always say that what you are doing is wrong.
One-third are neutral. They are not thinking of you and won’t respond no matter what you do.
The final third is your tribe. These are the people who support what you do.
The issue is we spend most of our time trying to win over the Haters and the Neutrals, and as a result, we become invisible to our Tribe.
To avoid offending or attracting criticism, we dilute our message and play small, making it nearly impossible for those who need to hear it to find us.
To avoid offending or attracting criticism, we dilute our message and play small, making it nearly impossible for those who need to hear it to find us. This happens because we hesitate to stand up for what we believe in and “shine our light.”
When I am concerned about rejection from posting on social media I reflect on this mindset hack. While I can’t control what others do, I can control “shining my light” so my tribe can find me!
7. There are no opportunities without growth
It is often said that everyone wants results, but they aren’t willing to put in the effort. This mindset hack allows us to focus on the personal growth we experience while working toward our goals.
When coaching my clients to become better listing agents, it’s crucial for them to attend more appointments with challenging sellers or compete against more experienced agents. Yes, they often hear that they weren’t selected due to a lack of experience, a limited marketing plan, or their pricing strategy—but it’s in these areas that their growth occurs.
We must embrace the experience and feedback, no matter how difficult or negative, to refine and improve ourselves.
While some may view this feedback as an immovable concrete wall, prompting them to change direction or give up entirely, this mindset hack brings our focus back to growth and how it is simply part of the journey. We must embrace the experience and feedback, no matter how difficult or negative, to refine and improve ourselves. This will allow us to gradually chip away at the wall until we ultimately break through to the other side.
When you focus on your growth, you’ll come to realize that you’ve achieved your goal — not merely through trial and error, but by becoming a better version of yourself along the way.
8. Give, with no expectation to receive
This mindset hack is a struggle for many new agents who have come from 9-5 jobs. The idea that you can put in a long day’s work and not receive any compensation in return is inconceivable for many.
The real estate marketplace doesn’t reward you for your time or efforts; it ONLY rewards you for the value you bring.
Make no mistake. It is clear to me that you got your real estate license to earn an income and provide for yourself and your family, and you should get paid for the time you invest. However, the real estate marketplace doesn’t reward you for your time or efforts; it ONLY rewards you for the value you bring.
The paradox of our industry is that in order to achieve massive success and make the most money, you must give your knowledge, attention, and time with no expectation of compensation in return.
For example, if you are working with first-time home buyers, you must be willing to educate and guide them even if they are unable to buy today or are not committed to working with you. If you are helping sellers get their home sold, you may have to share some of your secrets with them in order to build your credibility and trust.
At times, it may feel like you’re giving too much without seeing any returns. However, if you adopt this mindset hack, you’ll learn to trust that the goodwill you’re putting out is planting seeds of value that will eventually blossom into future clients, referrals, and the income you desire.
Your Turn
These are just a few of my favorite mindset hacks that helped me navigate one of the toughest periods of my life. After 15 successful years of “impossible results” in real estate sales, I lost everything during the Great Recession. That moment of profound challenge became the catalyst for my greatest growth.
The mindset hacks I adopted during that time taught me patience and self-reflection and ultimately helped me evolve into the coach and leader I am today. These same principles now guide both me and my clients in achieving what may seem like “impossible goals.”
What mindset strategies have helped you overcome challenges in your career and life? I’d love to hear your insights — let’s grow together!